Sho’nuff do be cookin

Here we are folks
The dream we all dream of
Boy versus girl in the World Series of food

I know that Prince is picky about how and where his lyrics are used, but I’m sure as a vegan, he would urge you to sing this as you prepare for the first cook-off: boys versus girls, meat versus …cauliflower.

If you’ve read my ‘about page’ well done, you are very diligent. If not, shame on you, but as I want you to stay and read on, let me explain the purpose of this blog in 24 words.

I’ve stopped meat-eating but my husband hasn’t. I try to find recipes that are convenient and similar and judge which is tastiest as well.

I’m not sure that arbitrary 24 word limit that I imposed will have helped you follow my gist, but you are intelligent and dear to me and so I will start with my first dish quest and you will catch up (somewhere around the recipes bit I imagine). Tonight turned out to take an Americana theme for inspiration.

Hands up if you love fried chicken? (meeee! meeee!) Hands up if store bought fried chicken sometimes scares you because of the appalling urban myths that used to circulate about it? (meee! meee!) Deep fried rats and cysts aside, homemade chicken can be pretty tasty and although buttermilk and brining can make it truly sing, on a Wednesday night when you just want to put your feet above your head and slacken your jaw for an hour, you don’t have to go to all the effort, as you are about to find out. So what about your non-meat equivalent, punkass? Okay,I’m getting to that, thanks to a brilliant find on the PETA website, which should stave off any cravings for a wing or a thigh.

Buffalo cauliflower florets
Cauliflower florets
cup soy milk
cup flour
2 tsps garlic powder
2tsps paprika or oregano (or both)
tsp salt
Bottled hot sauce
2 tbsps olive oil

Preheat oven to 220 Centigrade. Mix soy milk, flour, herbs and spices together. Dunk in the cauliflower till they’re covered. Place in oven for eighteen minutes.

Meanwhile, flick to your chicken.

Fried chicken
Chicken breast in pieces
egg beaten in a bowl
flour in another bowl with paprika, salt, pepper, oregano (your choice of herbs)
vegetable oil

Heat an inch of veg oil in a frying pan. Dredge the chicken pieces in the flour, then the egg, then the flour again. Place them away from you in the pan of hot oil, turning once until they are cooked (5 mins). Cook it in batches if necessary.

Meanwhile, after 15 minutes or so, turn back to your cauli. Mix together your hot sauce and your oil and throw over the florets. Leave them to cook for another 6 minutes or so until they are looking quite crispy.

I cleared a little space and left my chicken to drain on kitchen towel, and rustled up a couple of sides that pleased everyone.

Sumac salad
Green beans
Asparagus
Garlic
Sumac (a purple spice which tastes of lemons)

In a pan, I sauteed the sliced garlic, added in the beans and asparagus and a little water to soften them up. When they were nearly finished cooking through, I threw in a handful of sumac and let it cook off. I halved a red pepper, filled one with haloumi and one with hummus and whacked it under the grill.

Voila. The whole thing took me around 40 minutes to pull together and the cauli was terrific. It had that nice, puffy crispy feel that is, let’s face it, the best part of fried chicken. I think that with a different sauce, it could be served as an alternative for kung pao chicken as well. My husband said that the chicken was ‘good’.

Thanks for that.

So who wins this one? I can categorically state that no rats or cysts were harmed in the preparation of my dish and my husband only managed one word in praise of his. So that means:
Vegan 1 Meaty 0

May the odds be ever in my flavour! (parp)

Buffalo cauliflower with hot sauce, sumac salad and pepper stuffed with haloumi (before I realised I’d put the hummus one on the other plate by mistake. Derp.)